absotutely

I hate days like this. I hate them very much. I press repeat on the song I've recently fallen in love with:


I know it's hard for you to show that you love me
I can see when you look at me you want to tell me
you say you don't know how
but you don't have to 'cause I know
you say you don't know how
but you don't have to 'cause I know


But then the feeling comes. It comes at a speeding power, crushing me with all it's might and leaves me with a sense of doubt. I doubt myself. I doubt you. I doubt it. I doubt us. I feel out of place like anywhere in the world but the place I'm in would be the place I belong. Just not the settings I'm currently placed in. Whats wrong? I look at the beautiful slanted tree in the yard of the house that looks like it'd store lonely spirits and people with beautiful minds. I think to myself, I'd wanna be there. I know I'd fit in, sitting right there on that branch. But then I remember, I'll never be there. That's not my place. That's someone else's. So i let the feeling pass and I let time pass. Suddenly, it's gone. I'm right where I need to be. My stomach softens. My mind flows. My breathing slows. My heart is steady.



The off feeling of uncertainty.